We recently took our oldest Aspie son to see the final installment of HARRY POTTER. I greatly enjoyed these last 2 films as these adaptations represented the books at a very high level. It really bothers me when films that started as books are changed for "audience" preference. But enough about that. Our Aspie son had an awesome time at the movie. He started reading the series when he was in second grade and was completing book reports on them by the time he was in fifth grade...much to the surprise of his literature teacher. He is currently reading a chapter a day to our middle Aspie son....who has expressed great trepidation about chapter books.
Over the years, we have had many discussion about symbolism, the typical "heroic tale", good vs. evil, the continuation of life, etc. But the movie inspired a discussion that, up to now, we had not broached. THE LOVE OF A MOTHER....whether that love expressed is from a biological mother or father...or a caregiver....or a maternal figure. (I firmly believe that many people "mother" a child.) I don't know if this was meant to be a theme of the series or if many people have discovered this theme before....either way, it was quite profound for me.
(READ NO FURTHER IF YOU DO NOT WANT TO KNOW CERTAIN FACTS ABOUT THE STORIES.)
The book series was started as a way for a mother to calm her children to sleep. This mother later turned the bedtime story into an income that supported her children. In the first book, Harry's mother protects him with a "power beyond magic". Neville's mother and father gave up their sanity in hopes of riding their world of evil for the safety of their son. Snape gave of his life in order to preserve the integrity of Lilly Potter's love for Harry...even though Snape had to work through his past wounds inflicted by Harry's father. Molly Weasley had that WONDERFUL clock that would let her know where her children were at all times and if they were in danger. Hermione protected her non-magical parents in order to save their lives and their sorrow....although it meant severing their relationship. Hagrid tried to become a mother to not 1 but 2 magical creatures and finally took up the mantle of caring for his giant half-brother. Narcissa Malfoy chose to betray the dark lord in exchange for the knowledge of her son's fate. Those who have sacrificed themselves for their love of Harry, his mother, father, godfather and friends, returned to him in his most vulnerable hour...giving him the fortitude to do that which was good and right rather than that which was easy. And, in the end, time continues...as does love....with that love empowering these children to grow up and take on the responsibilities of having children themselves. I am sure there are other examples of "a mother's love" in these stories.
All of us who love and care for children...."mother" them. And that love is a choice.....and active. Love is seen most often as an expression of affection...which it is. But true love involves a person MAKING A CHOICE to lose themselves to the needs of others...being present....being active. As parents or caregivers of Aspie children, or any child, that active love can be painful at times. We know this going in...but we choose to do it anyway......daily.
"There is no greater love than to lay down one's life..."
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